i hate the internet
i fucking hate how the cringe culture-infested, encyclopedia dramatica/4chan-influenced internet i grew up in shaped me
i hate that i feel like i have to be good at a topic to tell anyone i like it, and how much of a panic-inducing ordeal that used to make sharing my work
i hate how much it robbed me of the joy of just making a thing, without the care of who's looking
i hate how afraid it made me to participate in even any online communities, even anonymous ones, and how many experiences i'd missed out on because of it
i hate how much i still struggle with participating in anything online, and how much conscious effort it takes to say the smallest thing in discussion spaces
i fucking hate it and i hate myself
back then, folks would often say they did it to prevent dumb kids from embarrassing themselves.
is this really better? is it really better to have created an environment of fear? to have pushed those dumb kids away? to have given them a warped, harmful view of the worth of their work? to have left them too scared to show even the meekest sign of life, lest the wrong person notice it?
the internet is a better, more welcoming place now, yet i'm still struggling to feel comfortable, and i doubt i'm the only one.
internet person, please respect your fellow netizens -- your venom might live on longer than you anticipate.